People constantly ask me the most important qualities in a successful salesperson. After 15 years of working with individuals on a personal and professional level, personality and charisma would top the list.
But you don’t have to be as funny as a Seinfeld, as suave as a Connery, as sophisticated as a Diana, or even as loud and obnoxious as a Costanza to have a personality. You just have to be positive, fun, confident, and give others the feeling that you’re alive.
People love a great personality. We tend to be drawn toward people who possess charisma because they’re likeable. I don’t know too many people who like to be around snobs, wimps, jerks, whiners, or know-it-alls. The negativity of these types of people breeds more negativity, just as positive energy attracts more positive energy. You can hang around people who make you feel good or make you feel bad, but it's you who must choose which people you want to influence your life.
Sometimes you can't avoid them— those individuals who love nothing more than to radiate the crap of the day. Make a positive into a negative. Whine about their lives and bring you down, too.
This doesn’t mean you ignore people. Let’s face it, if you have a negative boss or co-worker, you may still have to work with them. In this circumstance, you need to make sure that you opt for positive choices when you’re around them. You don’t have to be negative just because they are! And who knows? Perhaps your positive characteristics will rub off on them. “Kill ’em with kindness” is what mama used to say!
Exactly how did I manage to develop my personality? Try these four tactics for boosting your self-confidence, which, in turn, will help you naturally start behaving in a more outgoing manner.
Like yourself… screw the rest—If you want others to like you, you have to like yourself first. Resolve that you are who you are, a person of value with unique gifts and talents to offer, and like yourself unconditionally. Such a disposition builds high self-esteem, which transfers to others. You will always have people who don’t like you, but in the end… who cares!
Dress to impress… you—Your appearance determines some of how you are perceived. More important, you feel good about yourself when you look great, and when you look great, you feel great. Others will see your confidence and react positively to it.
Don’t suck at your job—Whether you like your job or not, be good at it! This expertise builds an air of confidence. Others will recognize your skills and will compliment you, which not only helps your reputation but also your self-esteem.
Shut your yapper—Take an interest in others. Find out what makes them tick. Ask them questions about themselves: their day, their hobbies and their jobs. Let your audience, associate or customer talk, and really listen to what they say so you can respond appropriately. Good listening skills make you more attractive to others. It’s not about you, dummy! Determine their type of personality, search out their interests, and adapt your disposition to bond with them. People automatically like other people who are like them, so discover through conversation something that you have in common, and let it drive your interaction. Don't pretend to have something in common, as most people can see through pretense, but discover a genuine commonality.
The more you put the above ideas into practice, the more you will see how your personality will help your sales and how others will enjoy being with you.
In his new book, Think & Act Like A Winner, author and professional speaker Rob Wilson discusses techniques for sales, motivation, and personal success.