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<p>One minute I’m speaking to a women’s group about <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/how-to-write-a-book-advice-for-new-writers/">my new novel</a>. The next, I’m digressing about side hustling as a furniture restorer and my day job <a href="http://orderperiod.com/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">as a professional organizer</a>. Before I know it, I’m mentioning my love for Bruce Springsteen.</p>



<p>As my workshop ends, all hands go up at once. One woman wants to know the best way to remove stains from an antique wooden door. Another woman wants to know how many times I have seen Springsteen. Another person asks me about a portion of my book that is all about how Italian Americans make Sunday gravy. Before I can figure out how any of these questions relate to my new novel, I realize that I have a long line of people waiting to purchase my book.</p>



<h2 id="h-swirling-aka-side-hustling">Swirling, aka side hustling</h2>



<p>Among the readers is an energetic and stylish woman named Betty Galvan. “It was great listening to you. I am a swirler, too,” she says with a wink. My look of puzzlement begs a definition. She tells me that a ‘swirler’ is a term coined by screenwriter, author and publicity and content strategist <a href="https://melissacassera.com/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Melissa Cassera</a>. ‘Swirler’ refers to someone who incorporates all of the best parts of themselves into one uber-career or brand. Galvan began her swirly career in teaching while side hustling at a beauty salon. That led to a successful blog and job in digital marketing. Today she has combined all of those passions into career advice as she helps other Swirlers navigate business success in the worlds of digital marketing and social media with her company <a href="https://www.myfriendbettysays.com/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">My Friend Betty Says</a>.</p>



<p>This meaning of “swirling” might be new, but the concept of <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/12-easy-ways-to-make-extra-money/">creating more income</a> is not. People have been moonlighting, <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/the-side-hustle-handbook/">taking side jobs</a> and even investing in real estate to create more revenue streams for generations. Up until this point, I mistakenly labeled my career habits as a bored, “Jacklyn of all, mistress of nothing” type. But new times call for a new definition. So, I went to Cassera, who literally wrote the workbook on swirling. <a href="https://melissacassera.gumroad.com/l/swirleffect" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>The Swirl Effect</em></a> explains the importance of combining your passions <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/side-hustles-simplified-from-idea-to-profit/">with business success</a>. </p>



<p>“When you are doing an activity that’s one of your passions, you feel like the absolute best version of yourself,” she says. “Once I figured that out, it transformed my business. I quadrupled my revenue, building a business that brings in multiple six figures every single year.”&nbsp;</p>



<h2 id="h-side-hustlers-are-mostly-millennials-and-gen-z">Side hustlers are mostly Millennials and Gen Z.</h2>



<p>I had an epiphany after talking with her, as I am sure most people do. The conversation made me realize that I had been swirling my entire life. I moonlighted on my publishing career with professional organizing and began writing my novel while refinishing furniture. Like Galvan, I have always had a side job, or in today’s parlance, a side hustle. “Hustle” is a term I became familiar with while listening to Ann Shoket present her book, <a href="https://amzn.to/2zf3AMQ" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>The Big Life</em></a>. The book devotes significant space to the importance of the side hustle, an opportunity to learn something new on your own time. Shoket’s book is directed toward the millennial, which is no surprise. She spent the first part of her career building the confidence of young women as the <a href="https://www.seventeen.com/author/9832/ann-shoket/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">editor-in-chief</a> at <em>Seventeen</em> magazine.</p>



<p>According to <a href="https://zapier.com/blog/side-hustle-report-2022/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">a 2022 Zapier report</a>, 59% of Generation Z and 61% of millennial respondents currently have a side hustle, while only 36% of Generation X and 22% of baby boomers said the same. Additionally, 60% of Gen Z and 55% of millennials were planning to start a side hustle at some point in 2022 at the time they were surveyed, with only 35% of Gen X and 13% of baby boomers reporting the same thing. </p>



<p>Nick Loper is founder and chief side hustler of <a href="https://www.sidehustlenation.com/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Side Hustle Nation</a>. He says he sees this trend as strong among millennials more out of necessity than passion. “We’ve seen the cost of housing, education and healthcare skyrocket over the past 30 years while wages have been flat,” he says.</p>



<h2 id="h-why-side-hustling-is-popular-now">Why side hustling is popular now</h2>



<p>Loper cites the popularity of his site as a societal trend that is growing among the millennials and beyond. He attributes this increase to a “proactive drive to take over our financial lives.”</p>



<p>Loper took back his own financial life when he took <a href="https://www.sidehustlenation.com/shoesniper-postmortem/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">his original side hustle</a>, a comparison-shopping site for footwear, <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/what-to-do-when-your-side-hustle-overtakes-your-day-job/">into a full-time business</a>. He later realized his passion was talking about business and marketing, and created his site as a resource for people to take control over their own financial well-being through entrepreneurship. “And that’s really what the hustle is about: being proactive about the one thing you can control, your own effort,” he says.</p>



<h3 id="h-become-an-entrepreneur-without-quitting-your-day-job">Become an entrepreneur without quitting your day job</h3>



<p>The idea of side hustling can be comforting for someone who has a business idea and is reluctant to quit their job. It can also be an intimidating and often unrealistic proposition. Chris Guillebeau founded <a href="https://sidehustleschool.com/about/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Side Hustle School</a> to help people create an <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/side-hustle-smarts-5-metrics-to-measure-success/">all-new source of income</a> without quitting their day job.</p>



<p>“This is critical, because these days everyone is being told that they should become an entrepreneur, but not everyone wants to do that. Everyone, however, wants more money and more options,” he says.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Guillebeau’s podcast assists in his mission through its focus on sharing how people came up with their ideas, and the mistakes and money they have made. He differentiates the side hustle from <a href="https://www.investopedia.com/terms/g/gig-economy.asp" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">the gig-based economy</a>, which implies contract work with short-term engagements. “I’m focused on helping people create assets for themselves, not just more work, or a part-time job. I’m interested in stories of people who wake up in the morning, check their phone and see that they’ve made $200 while they were sleeping,” he says.</p>



<p>Loper recommends starting small with the ‘<a href="https://www.sidehustlenation.com/side-hustle-snowball/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Side Hustle Snowball</a>.’ Itemize out your monthly expenses and then try to erase those with income streams outside of your day job. “It’s intimidating to try and replace your day job salary right out of the gate,” he says. </p>



<p>And for those of you still trying to decide which term defines you, in the words of Cassera, “Swirl on!”</p>



<p class="has-small-font-size"><em>This article was published in October 2017 and has been updated. Photo by Viktoriia Hnatiuk/Shutterstock</em></p>

Do you have a business idea but are reluctant to quit your day job? Side hustling might be right for you. Here’s what you need to know.

Do you have a business idea but are reluctant to quit your day job? Side hustling might be right for you. Here’s what you need to know. | SUCCESS

The Art of the Side Hustle

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Side Hustling: Is It the Right Option for You? | SUCCESS

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Mary Carlomagno is the owner of Order, which specializes in clutter control, urban apartment solutions, office spaces and shopping addictions. Mary’s philosophy is simple: do not let clutter control your life. Her easy-going approach, sense of style and strong communication skills create an atmosphere that makes organizing fun. She is the author of three books, Give it Up! My Year of Learning to Live Better with Less, Secrets Of Simplicity and Live More, Want Less. Mary has been featured on The Oprah Winfrey Show, The Today Show, CBS News, in Redbook, Real Simple and Woman’s Day. She has been interviewed on National Public Radio, the Joan Hamburg Show and Martha Stewart Living.

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Mary Carlomagno

<p>In 2005 I was confident. I had just appeared on the <em>Today</em> show to promote my first nonfiction book, an account of how my life was transformed by sacrificing some little luxuries. Just six months before, I had <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/3-ways-to-leave-your-job-and-start-your-career/">made a major career change</a>, leaving my position as a marketing director at a publishing company to start my own business and begin a writing career.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Why I put off writing a book</h2>



<p><a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/how-to-write-a-book-advice-for-new-writers/">Writing a novel</a> has always been my dream. Although I was having financial success as a writer, I wasn’t sure that my skills could translate from nonfiction to fiction. Like most working writers, a deadline with pay sets off an internal starting gun that allows the words to flow freely and willingly to the page. The risky promise of some hypothetical future payday from a novel wasn’t enough to motivate me. Even thinking the word novel conjures intimidating figures—Richard Ford, Margaret Atwood, Jhumpa Lahiri and John Irving. I’m petrified by the pretentiousness of the notion that my book would ever be allowed on a bookshelf anywhere near the work of my heroes.</p>



<p><a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/how-to-overcome-self-doubt-and-become-the-hero-of-your-story/">Wallowing in self-doubt</a> had always derailed my writing process. I was spending more time managing how I felt about the writing than actually writing anything. It reminded me of the people who obsess about how bad their mess is instead of straightening out the piles.</p>



<p>My insecurities were grounded in my deep knowledge of book publishing, where I worked for 16 years promoting authors. Industry people are truly selfless in their love of the written word, and with that love comes a high expectation of quality. Because we read books, talk about books, dream about books and sometimes love books like they’re family members, most of us foster a secret desire to write them. Honestly, many book publishing people should write. Most have the critical eye and training to recognize good writing. At least that’s what I would tell just about any book publishing person I know.</p>



<p>But I couldn’t take that advice myself.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-nanowrimo-challenge-write-a-book-in-30-days">NaNoWriMo challenge: write a book in 30 days</h2>



<p>One of the first considerations in writing this book is figuring out who is telling the story. Is it an all-knowing observer inside the story, like Nick Carraway in <a href="https://amzn.to/3tk2QI2" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>The Great Gatsby</em></a>? Or is it a witty, self-deprecating diarist, as in <a href="https://amzn.to/3tgGQxK" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>Bridget Jones’s Diary</em></a>?</p>



<p>I email a writer friend who tells me, without a doubt, “Do not write in first-person narrative. You can’t tell the story as effectively that way, so write in third person!” Inhabiting the omniscient power of the third person is impossible as I churn out only two dismal sentences over the next two days. I can’t seem to stop correcting myself, believing that each word needs to be perfect before I commit it to the page.</p>



<p>After several more single-sentenced attempts, I admit defeat. I can’t do this alone. Desperate for a solution, I find the website for <a href="https://nanowrimo.org/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">National Novel Writing Month</a> (NaNoWriMo), which recommends the book <a href="https://amzn.to/3TyexWc" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>No Plot? No Problem!</em></a> by Chris Baty.</p>



<p>I’m a big advocate for 30-day challenges. At the time, I had just come off the experiment of giving things up month by month, serially, over the course of a year—what became my first book: <a href="https://amzn.to/3TAgeT4" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>Give It Up! My Year of Learning to Live Better with Less</em></a><em>.</em> I had long ago discovered that if you can do something for a month, you can do it for the rest of your life.</p>



<p>To write a book in 30 days, I determine I’ll need to write an average of 1,667 words every day, including weekends.</p>



<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Setting myself up for success</h3>



<p>Baty’s first recommendations give me instant courage. First, sign a contract with yourself for doing this monthlong commitment. This small action makes the project real. Second, turn off your inner editor, that nasty, brilliant part of your psyche that tells you how bad your writing is and essentially has its finger poised over the delete button before you can even hit the period at the end of the sentence. Baty goes so far as to recommend drawing a representation of the “‘Take My Inner Editor’ button” and physically hitting it every time you feel the urge to backspace and delete all the work you just hammered out. In my case, my inner editor has company: the iconic works on the shelf that appear to mock me. They remind me that I will not be like them, no matter how hard I try.</p>



<p>My inner publishing company also reminds me that not only can I not write a “real book,” I also have no plot, no hook, no marketable story that will allow me to eventually sell the book even if by some miracle I’m able to tough out the month. One of the voices is actually quite rude, asking, <em>Who do you think you are trying to write the great American novel?</em></p>



<p>I put my finger down on the Inner Editor Button I’ve drawn.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Writing a book in 30 days: Week 1</h2>



<p>Writing a book in 30 days without a plan is like baking a cake without a recipe. One need only mistake salt for sugar once to know that good carrot cake doesn’t just happen. I know there is no way to make this word count by winging it. Thankfully, Baty’s book also gives me a recipe to follow—which, for a first-timer in the novel game, is essential. Because I am goal-oriented, I equate my daily writing to the length of a magazine feature, more or less the size of this article. That would be 30 articles in one month. To give you a sense of what that means, I usually take anywhere from one to two weeks to write one full-length feature with editing, rewriting and fact-checking. This is five times the amount I am used to.</p>



<p>In Week 1,<strong> </strong>I <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/8-daily-tips-for-building-self-confidence/">let my insecurities go</a> and try to take control. I quickly realize third person is not working. Imagining myself talking to a good friend gives me the voice of the protagonist, Jessie DeSalvo. Once I resign myself to a first-person narrative, the writing gets easier.</p>



<p>I’m feeling better about the project overall, but I still feel anxious. My antidote to life’s angst <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/6-ways-yoga-today-will-make-you-better-tomorrow/">has always been yoga</a>. Each day after writing, I silence the literary demons in my head by taking a class. “In the words of Ram Dass, ‘Here Now,’” the instructor says. I wonder, <em>Is this a sign from the universe telling me to write, here, now?</em>&nbsp;</p>



<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Making it a daily ritual</h3>



<p>Applying this philosophy and plenty of deep breathing helps me release tension and meet my daily goals throughout the first week. At times, I type without knowing what I’m saying or where it’s going. It feels like a mad shopping spree where you take 27 items into the T.J. Maxx dressing room, hoping that in the end you’ll find one decent pair of jeans to purchase. According to my credit card, I always find a decent pair of jeans to purchase, so I trust that my editing can make pure genius out of whatever chaos I create. Once I let go of the pursuit of perfection and accept that it does not have to be pretty, especially the first time I type it, the word counts get easier.</p>



<p>By the end of Week 1, I notice a ritual beginning to form. For me, writing has to be ritualistic, like teeth brushing, <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/10-surprising-ways-to-take-exercise-beyond-a-habit/">exercise</a> or walking the dog. Consistency works, and soon I’m more afraid to skip than I am to write. Suddenly there’s nothing worse than skipping a day of 1,667 words and facing double that on the day after.</p>



<p>Because I’m not on Facebook while I’m working on this, I’m also not tempted to talk to people about what I’m doing instead of actually doing it. In fact, I’m reluctant to tell anyone that I’ve taken on this project at all. I feel like if I mention it, I’ll have to account for my progress—and for my failure—if this project doesn’t materialize.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Writing a book in one month: Week 2</h2>



<p>My life is consumed by the book as Week 2 begins. On the train to work, I pick up snippets of conversation, immediately jotting them down on a notepad. I become hyper-aware of my surroundings, trying to glean whatever sweet remarks or dialogue I overhear. These provide great jumping-off points for more words to flow. Some give me ideas for entire passages. The more I eavesdrop, the more it occurs to me that secret novel writing is a lonely business.</p>



<p>I muddle through the week with some level of confidence. After all, I had just completed nearly one quarter of the entire project in a week. I’m writing on average two or three hours per day, which leaves a lot of time to carry on with the rest of my work and life duties. My routine is solid: Write every morning, then head off to yoga class where I can find some ancient wisdom to apply to my daily struggle. When I hear their thoughts on suffering, I’m convinced that Buddhists must be novelists.</p>



<p>Soon enough, I encounter a new problem. My inner marketing director starts wondering how I’m going to publish this novel that I’ve only begun and not edited at all—and told almost nobody about.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Writing a book in 30 days: Week 3</h2>



<p>The nonfiction process is very straightforward: You essentially say, “Hey publisher, I have this great idea for a book! Here’s what it will look like. Here’s how I’ll market it. And here’s what it’s about.” The publisher then says, “That sounds great! Here’s some money. Now go write it.”</p>



<p>In the netherworld of fiction, you don’t have that luxury. You submit the end product, done, take it or leave it. And you get a lot of “leave it.” This concept weighs on me so heavily that by Week 3 I hit a major standstill. As the days go on, the writing gets harder because I can’t stop worrying about what will happen when I’m done. <em>Will anybody like it? Is this just a waste of time I could better spend making money in other ways?</em></p>



<p>Baty answers these questions in his chapter about making it to the halfway point. He instructs me to start thinking about how to wrap this story up and give the characters some closure. Thinking about that end point, and how close I already am, gives me the will to move on. I want to resolve the messy issues I’d already created for my characters in the first half of the book and that pushes me through Week 3. I manage to make up for some of the slower days, so by the start of Week 4 I’m just above the weekly target, with 38,000 words.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Crossing the finish line</h2>



<p>I’m excited about the prospect of completing the final week. I make a little chart to track the remaining seven days, like a prisoner checking off the final moments before freedom. By month’s end, my word count is 50,010. And although I should rejoice, all of those inner publishing people whom I had silenced over the past four weeks are back. And they’re angry. They want to know what comes next. Having a thick skin is part of being a writer, but at this stage I’m paralyzed, afraid to have anyone read the book. I print the unread manuscript and quickly put it into a filing cabinet, and I try not to think about it.</p>



<p>All of the demands I’d put off for a month come flooding back. I conveniently take assignments that don’t cause panic attacks, and over the next few years I write two more nonfiction books, helping more people tidy up their lives, and become a brand spokesperson. At one point, I pack the manuscript and all of my other possessions and move to a new home in the suburbs, placing my monthlong adventure into the same drawer of the same filing cabinet in a different house. Deep in my soul, I know the novel has to come out of the drawer and into the world. But I need encouragement again.</p>



<h3 class="wp-block-heading">What I learned about writing a book</h3>



<ul>
<li><strong>Let it go to let it flow. </strong>Stop “shoulding” on yourself entirely during this process. Some people have an inner editor. I had an inner committee of naysayers. There is no way to let creativity happen if you are judging yourself with every keystroke.</li>



<li><strong>Act as if you are a novelist.</strong> Stop comparing yourself to Leo Tolstoy or Charles Dickens. Other authors are not going to hunt you down and tell you that you are a charlatan for even dreaming to write a novel. News flash: They don’t care, and neither should you.</li>



<li><strong>Release the outcome. </strong>We all love having written a book, but not the actual writing. We love being fit but not working out. Disengage from the process of being done and get to the business of doing. You can’t have one without the other.</li>



<li><strong>Novel writing is not easy. </strong>If Buddhists believe that life is suffering, then novelists must be Buddhists. Good stuff always takes work. If it were easy, everyone would do it.</li>
</ul>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Revisiting the book I wrote in 30 days</h2>



<p>A few months after the move, I’m working with a client who hired me to catalog all of her short stories, article pitches and rejection letters. (Apparently her real editors were almost as mean as my inner editors.) When I tell my husband about this client, his mind goes to the same place as mine. He says simply, “You don’t want to look back at your life and regret leaving that book in a drawer.”</p>



<p>I make a new plan: I hire an editor named Ken Salikof, whose many career hats include author, screenwriter and manuscript editor. Over the length of a summer, he helps me edit my messy pages and talks me through the insecurities I still have. His best answer to my inner editor’s criticism: “Well, if Richard Ford wrote a chick lit book, maybe this would be it.”</p>



<p>I take it as high praise.</p>



<p>Several years after I wrote the book in 30 days, I sign a contract with Post Hill Press to publish my first novel: <a href="https://amzn.to/485Pezb" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>Best Friend for Hire</em></a>. It’s shelved in the women’s fiction and humor sections of stores, just a few feet away from my literary heroes. </p>



<p>And sometimes—if I let myself be truly happy—I push a metaphorical button to quiet <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/changing-the-narrative-how-to-silence-your-inner-critic-in-the-new-year/">the critics in my head</a>, and I believe I earned a place on that shelf.</p>



<p class="has-small-font-size"><em>This article originally appeared in the September 2017 </em><a href="https://store.success.com/by-media/magazines/success-magazine-september-2017-elon-musk.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>issue of </em>SUCCESS<em> ​magazine</em></a><em> and has been updated. Photo by</em> <em>Kostiantyn Voitenko/Shutterstock</em></p>

Do you have an idea for novel you want to write? Consider emulating NaNoWriMo—National Novel Writing Month—and write a book in 30 days.

I had long ago discovered that if you can do something for a month, you can do it for the rest of your life. | SUCCESS

Could You Write a Book in a Month?

Want to Write a Book in 30 Days? One Author's Success Story | SUCCESS

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What Happened When I Didn’t Complain for 30 Days

Personal Development

Personal Development Archives

Personal Development | SUCCESS | What Achievers Read

<p>Mark Twain once said that “habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.” I have lived by these words, coaxing change in my life by giving up one of 12 indulgences and conveniences (chocolate, shopping and cellphones among them) per month for a year. Then I literally wrote<a href="https://amzn.to/2sRmJkY" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"> the book on my experiences.</a></p>



<p>As I sacrificed something I liked month to month, I unfortunately adopted complaining as a coping mechanism. It was time to stop the carping and rebalance my life, so that’s how I came to accept another month-long challenge: I would not complain for the entire month. Or at least I would give it my best effort.</p>



<p>By the end of day one, I was prepared to denounce Twain’s approach and fling him down said steps. But deep down I knew he was right: Ritualistic practices for this exercise required the same level of effort, and the same step-by-step progress, as a concert pianist preparing for a performance. As my childhood flute teacher once said, practice does not make perfect, it makes permanent, something I proved when I kicked my four-cup-a-day coffee habit cold turkey.</p>



<p>Like my coffee challenge, complaining was an ingrained habit. This was most apparent when my kids returned to school for the fall semester; coffee and complaining are early-morning musts on many schooldays. The first day presented<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/article/4-ways-to-turn-obstacles-into-opportunities"> </a>a gauntlet of obstacles, from my kids’ finicky eating habits to constant clothing changes, despite preparation well ahead of day one: a bag packed with a healthy lunch, new school supplies in tow and an apple for the teacher.</p>



<p>I was ready for everything except the complicated drop-off system for parents who drive their kids to school. Before I could say, “Hope you had a nice summer,” a wave of panic and insecurity took over. I told my husband, “The car drop-off queue is totally flawed!” What I thought was a simple declarative statement did not resonate in that manner. Yes, I had strayed into… (cue scary music)…<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/article/wait-before-you-complain-here-are-5-things-to-ask-yourself"> </a><a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/5-steps-to-stop-complaining/">the complaint zone</a>.</p>



<p>As most parents would agree, the urge to complain begins early in the day. For me, it starts with that step into the shower, when exuberant children play peek-a-boo with the curtain. From an outside perspective, this sounds sweet. But in reality, I told them, “Just give me five minutes, for the love of pete!”</p>



<p>During my trying month, I realized that smartphones and other computers are the ultimate complaining enablers. These devices make it far too easy to launch a text blast or even (novelty alert!) place a call to gripe to my BFF about the cable man not showing up during his four-hour window. You can multiply that exponentially if you join in<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/blog/what-happened-when-i-ditched-technology-for-7-days"> </a>the gazillion social media conversations ranging from religious viewpoints to reality television diatribes to sports. The opportunities to voice opinions in online forums are endless. (Were we all more content before Facebook invited us to vent all over the walls? Or is it simply a natural human impulse to opine on everything that crosses our screens?)</p>



<p>An empty cupboard necessitated my leaving the computer. I sought solace at the supermarket, where the bread aisle turned out to be a trap. Before I could put the brakes on my tongue, I muttered about<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/article/craving-sugar-try-these-substitutes-instead"> </a>the high sugar content in bread. A fellow complainer who supported my bread assessment voiced my next thought: “There is sugar in everything,” she said. <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/play-your-way-sane/202208/how-curb-complaining" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Complaining not only loves company</a> but is also contagious—and self-fueling.</p>



<p>Once I started complaining, I couldn’t stop: forgotten passwords, misplaced homework assignments, those widowed socks that never find a mate, to name a few.</p>



<p>After struggling through much of this 30-day challenge, a lightbulb finally went off:<em> If I don’t start complaining, I won’t have to stop</em>. If I moved through the perfunctory tasks of the day concentrating on finishing them quickly,<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/blog/how-to-handle-adversity-dont-whine-dont-complain-dont-make-excuses"> </a>I reduced the window for whining.</p>



<p>I also found a way to manage my now-reduced urges: I replaced my complaining with something therapeutic, the music of Buddhist monks. And guess what?<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/blog/5-ways-to-stay-positive-when-youre-having-a-bad-day"> </a>My day went better. I boarded the happy-mommy train and made all the usual stops—cheerleading practices, birthday parties, soccer games and Cub Scout meetings—amid the chanting of om, namaste and shanti with zero complaints. The mellow sounds served as a relaxation device and as a reminder that neither Buddha nor Krishna nor Gandhi would scream at someone who cut them off in traffic. Like these spiritual teachers, I was living in the moment.</p>



<p>Finding that contented state enriched my life. And the month of no complaining had a bonus for my husband and kids: They were happier, too.</p>



<h2 id="h-what-is-your-complaining-type"><strong>What is your “complaining type”?</strong></h2>



<p>A certain degree of complaining is inevitable, but when it becomes habitual, it can negatively affect your mood and the mood of those around you. As Lao Tzu said, “The journey of one thousand miles begins with one step.” Your first step is to determine what kind of complainer you really are.</p>



<h3 id="h-superior-steve"><strong>Superior Steve</strong></h3>



<p>Steve stands in line at the checkout and mumbles under his breath to others that the cashier is incompetent and slow. Steve may think he’s in control, but he is really a victim giving the play-by-play on a situation that won’t change unless he reports the problem to the store manager.</p>



<p><a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/why-attitude-matters/">Change your attitude</a> to change the outcome.</p>



<h3 id="h-donna-downer"><strong>Donna Downer</strong></h3>



<p>Donna uses complaining as a conversation starter the way most people use hello. Complaining helps people unite over a common enemy and can often lead to bonding, but when Donna types take this too far, they become social pariahs. She sees herself as creating something positive over this shared disdain, but others just want to run for cover.</p>



<p>Here’s how to <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/4-tips-to-combat-negative-thinking/">handle the negative energy</a>.</p>



<h3 id="h-venting-veronica"><strong>Venting Veronica</strong></h3>



<p>Meet up with her, and you have signed up for Monday morning quarterbacking on everything from a reality-show faux pas to her significant other’s slovenly housekeeping. She is that negative friend who can’t wait to unload all of life’s problems on you. Sessions with her do little besides fostering an environment of feeding on the flaws of others.</p>



<p>Use these tips to <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/setting-healthy-boundaries-3-simple-steps-to-establishing-boundaries-that-stick/">avoid information burnout</a> from chronic venters.</p>



<h3 id="h-bobby-blamer"><strong>Bobby Blamer</strong></h3>



<p>Bobby doesn’t view himself as a complainer, nor does he ever see any fault in his own actions. He spends his time blaming every mishap, mistake or accident on anyone he can find. In his own mind, Bobby does no wrong.</p>



<p><a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/why-you-should-stop-using-excuses/">Stop making excuses</a>—you’ll be much happier.</p>



<p>If you see yourself in one or more of these profiles, pause before you speak. Then, filter your words or keep your thoughts to yourself. Take responsibility for your actions and refrain from being a black cloud. Others will appreciate it, you’ll radiate more sunshine and less gloom, and you’ll strengthen (instead of weaken) your relationships.</p>



<p class="has-small-font-size"><em>This article appears in the<a href="https://store.successcom.wpenginepowered.com/by-media/magazines/success-magazine-february-2016-joel-osteen.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"> February 2016 issue of </a></em><a href="https://store.successcom.wpenginepowered.com/by-media/magazines/success-magazine-february-2016-joel-osteen.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">SUCCESS</a><em><a href="https://store.successcom.wpenginepowered.com/by-media/magazines/success-magazine-february-2016-joel-osteen.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"> magazine</a> and has been updated. Photo by Cast Of Thousands/Shutterstock</em></p>

Complaining is inevitable, but when it becomes habitual, it can negatively affect your mood and those around you.

Complaining is inevitable, but when it becomes habitual, it can negatively affect your mood and those around you. | SUCCESS

What Happened When I Didn’t Complain for 30 Days | SUCCESS

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3 Steps to Finally Tackle Your Tedious Tasks

<p>Every job has some degree of repetitious, uninspiring tasks that can often be boring and exhausting. Most people dread tasks like stuffing envelopes or filling out expense reports, and would prefer more fulfilling and stimulating work. As a professional organizer who encourages people to <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/joy-at-work/">find the joy in tidying up</a> their desks, calendars and filing cabinets, I am very familiar with the thinking behind grunt work, as organizing often falls into that category. But I don’t get offended, because I know that 99% of this is mental; that is, managing how you feel about the tasks instead of achieving the actual tasks themselves.</p>



<p>Three major emotional obstacles stand in the way of muscling through the grunt work.</p>



<ul><li>How we feel about what we are doing, which places us in a judgmental, often unpleasant state.</li><li>We wait for perfect conditions to begin, such as being in the mood or the right time of day to engage in certain tasks.</li><li>The greatest obstacle we face is procrastination, which by definition is the choosing of a more pleasurable task over the task at hand.</li></ul>



<h2 id="h-1-change-your-mindset"><strong>1. Change your mindset.</strong></h2>



<p>Let’s begin all of this emotional thinking by giving the term grunt work a more desirable title, such as “the necessary.” These smaller jobs are necessary players in your ensemble of work. The famous actor and playwright Constantin Stanislavski once said, “There are no small roles, only small actors.” He meant to encourage his actors to invest in what they were given, regardless of the amount of lines or stage time. Since our perception is that these jobs are small or menial at best, and at worst demeaning or boring, we find ourselves labeling or judging the work. When you trivialize the work from the start, your emotions take over. The first step is to release the emotion and judgment<strong> </strong>you have around this work and <a href="https://hbr.org/2018/09/how-to-help-your-team-manage-grunt-work" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">simply engage in it</a>.</p>



<p>Recently we had our kitchen remodeled with all new cabinetry. The cabinetmaker came every day for several days and made all of the cabinets by hand. I marveled not only at his craftsmanship but also at his ability to perform repetitive tasks over and over again. He did not question what he was doing or emotionalize it; he simply built beautiful cabinets, one step at a time. The small daily steps he took brought him to a beautiful body of work (and a beautiful new kitchen for us). He understood that each task built upon the next, all equally contributing to the final product.</p>



<h2 id="h-2-stop-waiting"><strong>2. Stop waiting.</strong></h2>



<p>The second obstacle people face is that they <a href="https://medium.com/better-advice/there-is-no-perfect-timing-in-life-there-is-just-time-and-what-you-do-with-what-youre-given-633388de8d0e" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">wait for the perfect condition</a> to attack these jobs, fooling themselves into thinking there is a right time of day or certain mood they need to be in before they can start. Set up your daily schedule with the most favorable times to engage in this kind of work. If you <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/4-morning-routine-tips-to-set-yourself-up-for-a-successful-day/">work better in the morning</a>, take the early part of the day to do these less desirable tasks. This will also give you an early sense of accomplishment, which carries you throughout the day. Consider setting a timer, even just 15 minutes to start. As you <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/how-to-create-the-perfect-conditions-for-deep-focus/">get better at focusing</a>, you can extend the time. This will give you an idea of how long it will take you to accomplish these tasks. You might find that 15 minutes a day helps you accomplish all that you need in one week.</p>



<h2 id="h-3-stick-to-it"><strong>3. Stick to it.</strong></h2>



<p>It doesn’t take much to <a href="https://hbr.org/2019/12/10-quick-tips-for-avoiding-distractions-at-work" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">derail us from our work</a>. Something as simple as a text or social media post can cause us to put off the work at hand. Suddenly, procrastination has replaced our emotional thinking. This could happen in just about every situation where a choice has to be made; there will simply always be something better to choose. I’m not alone in my thinking. Procrastination experts say this delay of tasks does little to help you. It just puts off the inevitable. Wouldn’t it be better to get the nasty task out of the way<strong> </strong>to begin with?</p>



<p>Handling procrastination habits can be solved with simple reward-setting. If you set up a plan to clear up your office filing system over the course of a week,<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/blog/this-7-step-morning-routine-helped-me-build-a-billion-dollar-brand"> </a>make a daily routine for doing the work. By week’s end, you can reward yourself with something commensurate with the goal achieved. I don’t mean booking a trip to Vegas for clearing out one desk drawer; instead, reward yourself with a latte or small treat. This system of work and reward will not only get you to your goal faster, but also makes the work more pleasurable along the way.</p>



<p>With these simple<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/article/7-crucial-mindset-shifts-to-achieve-everything-you-want"> </a><a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/mindset-and-the-happiness-factor/">shifts in how we think</a> and feel about the necessary, <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/12-productivity-tools-and-strategies-to-help-you-seize-the-day/">we can be more productive</a>. In the words of St. Francis of Assisi, “Start by doing what is necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible.”</p>



<p class="has-small-font-size"><em>This article was published in October 2017 and has been updated. Photo by&nbsp;@Korneevamaha/Twenty20</em></p>

Every job has some degree of repetitious, uninspiring tasks that can often be boring and exhausting. How we feel about what we are doing often dictates the result of our work.

Every job has some degree of repetitious, uninspiring tasks that can often be boring and exhausting. How we feel about what we are doing often dictates the result of our work. | SUCCESS

3 Steps to Finally Tackle Your Tedious Tasks | SUCCESS

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Professional Growth

Professional Growth Archives

Professional Growth | SUCCESS | What Achievers Read

Success

Success Archives

Success | SUCCESS | What Achievers Read

<h2>1. Let it go to let it flow.</h2>

<p>Stop “shoulding” on yourself entirely during this process. Some people have an inner editor. I had an inner committee of naysayers. There is no way to <a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/article/a-4-question-guide-to-unlock-your-creativity">let creativity happen</a> if you are judging yourself with every keystroke.</p>

<h2>2. Act as if you are a novelist.</h2>

<p>Stop comparing yourself to Leo Tolstoy or Charles Dickens. Other authors are not going to hunt you down and tell you that you are a charlatan for even dreaming to write a novel. News flash: They don’t care, and neither should you.</p>

<h2>3. Release the outcome.</h2>

<p>We all love having written a book, but not the actual writing. We love being fit but not working out. Disengage from the process of being done and get to the business of doing. You can’t have one without the other.</p>

<h2>4. Novel writing is not easy.</h2>

<p>If Buddhists believe that life is suffering, then novelists must be Buddhists. Good stuff always takes work. If it were easy, everyone would do it.</p>

<p class="rteindent1"><em>Related:</em>&nbsp;<a href="https://successcom.wpenginepowered.com/blog/could-you-write-a-book-in-a-month"><strong>Could You Write a Book in a Month?</strong></a></p>


1. Let it go to let it flow. Stop “shoulding” on yourself entirely during this process. Some people have an inner editor. I had an inner committee of

1. Let it go to let it flow. Stop “shoulding” on yourself entirely during this process. Some people have an inner editor. I had an inner committee of | SUCCESS

How to Write a Book

How to Write a Book | SUCCESS