Let’s talk absolutes. Politicians will break their campaign promises. New Year’s resolutions will be broken. Dieting is only successful until the next birthday or holiday. Promises have a funny way of evaporating. But can I get you to try one more promise if I make a promise in return? Come back to this blog again and again, and I promise to be more than another smiling face baiting your interest, then telling you the “real secrets” are in her book… or her 38-part CD series.
I want success for you, now. As a host of a nationally syndicated radio show, a guest moderator on Donny Deutsch’s The Big Idea, and a former corporate and personal life coach, I’m not in the business of stringing you along. I want you to take control, change your mindset, and “make it happen!”
But who am I to be giving advice, anyway? Between my husband Chris and I, we’ve held jobs, quit jobs, taken on more than one job, and have been fired and laid off so many times now we’ve lost count.
And every time it was the same. It always felt like the worst thing that could happen to us. And why does it always come at the worst possible time?
I’m a mom and career and life coach and I’m not immune. A layoff is a blow to your ego. How do you not take it personally when someone tells you to pack your stuff and get out? Besides the personal blow to your ego, Where are you supposed to go, then? You’ve arrived at SUCCESS, so you’re on the right path.
Your whole life, people have been telling you what to do. Take vitamin C to ward off colds. Take a Ginkgo biloba supplement to improve your memory. Take an aspirin, drink lots of water, eat nuts, walk, run, stretch, don’t go swimming for at least an hour after you eat, and on and on and on.
Do you ever wonder how in the heck you managed to get through 13 years of elementary school, junior high and high school, and then four to eight years of college and postgraduate studies? And now, for some reason, calling and inquiring about that franchise opportunity just isn’t happening? We’ll tell you exactly why. Zero accountability! You are no longer reporting to anyone. For all those years, you were completely accountable to your family, to friends, to coaches, teachers and guidance counselors. And then, at some point, your “bosses” all went away and you were on your own.
That’s why I’m here. I’m about to tell you to take out the trash, do your homework, floss, and stop picking on your kid sister. So listen up. Let’s keep with the theme of being laid off or starting your own business, which is very topical at the moment.
Step 1: Realize that the emotion you are feeling is all background noise. Whatever is keeping you from what you want to do, it’s all in your head. If you’re in your own head, you’re behind enemy lines. Let’s do this: Make a list of those distractions. “I’m afraid we’ll lose the house.” “What about daycare costs?” “Health insurance?” “I’ll go broke.”
Step 2: Figure out how much time is needed until your business will sustain you (or until you need to take “any job”), and how much money it needs to make monthly, and by when! Pick a hard and fast date! If that date comes and goes and you aren’t making the money you determined as necessary, time for Plan B – you go back to work, find a new job, or a second job.
Step 3: Take that list from Step 1 and make a plan to address every one of them in the time frame you’ve created in Step 2.
Step 4: Have a state-of-the-state every Sunday night – and work together if you are in a relationship – and go over the plan in Step 2 to make sure you are on track. The more you talk about this, the less fear you will feel, the more real the change will become, and over time, the excitement and support will drive the success. Run your home life as another component of the business.
The steps are really that simple. Did you list your “background noise”? If you didn’t, stop reading. Go back and write it down. Remember, I said a big reason we lose focus is because we’re no longer reporting to anyone. You must have a “road map” and be accountable to your spouse, your partner, your family and yourself.
You will make things happen when you, once again, become accountable to other people, and SUCCESS, and me – we’re going to be those people. We’re glad you’ve found us and we hope you’re ready for the ride of your life.
Mel Robbins is a no-nonsense life and business coach who has turned her expertise and love for helping people into an impressive media career. She is the producer and host of the hit syndicated radio show The Mel Robbins Show, a daily talk-radio show that changes the lives of callers through honest and entertaining coaching, storytelling and problem solving. She is also a monthly Columnist for SUCCESS magazine. For more, check out her site.
